mrpauley.com
Mr. Pauley

Once upon a time there was an angry kid. It was me. I was angry that I was fat, that girls didn’t like me, that I had to move to a new city and leave my friends…oh wait, that shit all just happened. I’m angry because I’m fat, girls don’t like me, and I just moved.

I’m actually incensed. Enraged. Blinded with self hatred. And finding no suitable outlet for it. I always thought I’d be enormously rich and successful by this point in my life. I thought I’d be in love with my soulmate, and touring the world, writing music all over the place.

I’m not.

And I could, at this point, tell you all how God’s in cont…

THERE’S STILL NO FUCKING ICE!!!

…how God’s in control and how everything happens for a reason. But I’m not going to.

I’m not going to because I don’t know if that’s all true. I don’t know if God’s in control and everything happens for a reason. I mean, that’s what I believe, but maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I just plain fucked up. Maybe my calling in life is to be a teacher. Maybe I had signs, over and over again, to change my behavior and I just made a choice not to. I don’t know.

Let me just say, I don’t think I’m fat. I know girls like me, and I’m a little pissed off that I’m down here in “go fuck yourself county” but I’ve hardly moved away from all my friends. It’s a transition period.

What am I going to do? Well, I don’t know. Right now I have a trip planned to France again.

THE FUCKING CAT HAS MY EARPLUGS!!!

Anyhoo, I have things on the horizon. In addition to France, I can potentially play on a cruise ship in the fall. I was playing with a guitar player named Yuji and a drummer named Filippo last year. It was a lot of fun; they’re good guys, great players. And we’d be teaming up with this singer named Lynn. So that might be the answer.

So the deal is, I’ve got more opportunities for work than I’ve had in a long time. And by work, I mean, stuff that I could really make a career out of.

God’s got me here. I’m not driven to do anything else right now. I’m starting to make money here and there, it’s good stuff. So what do I do when things get fucked up?

I guess I write. And God fucking knows if that’ll help.

Pun Intended.

Alex

This entry was posted on Thursday, August 20th, 2009 at 8:55 am and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow responses to this entry through the Comments RSS Feed. You can leave a response or trackback from your site.